Defeat is Temporary Glory is Forever Pt 2

I can't believe its been so long since the last post and  now I've only got one days access to a computer before i go to Christchurch, to visit my sister and family. So I stress that this an impromptu post, and not sure if this will turn into a train wreck.The story about losing access to my computer is a whole other post. Seriously, if I hadn't been in the midst of a cancer battle, I wouldn't believe that you could even write this scenario.
Anyway, I had a framework in mind for how this post was to be written, as is with everything i write, I write a draft in my head and edit and re-edit until I am somewhat satisfied, then change it all as I type it. The main reason for this is typing with one finger(my ring finger if it was on my right hand) is cumbersome and time consuming, which leaves many opportunities to be led astray on tangents of ill disciplined whimsy, leaving my mind and loyal trigger finger to try and reign all this in, and rearrange these bewildered rantings into a semi-coherent pattern of words. I swear it is truly  like trying to learn a song, you've heard a few times but can't really remember the melody, you are able to string a few phrases together but get the sense they arent really right and the context you are putting them has turned this innocent vibrant young woman of a song. into a hairy, heavy set pre-op trans gender person, with quite a distinct odour, type of song. Now both songs are valid and beautiful to me but for reasons that very different.
 Like earlier stated I start my process,with  a theme or event thats been stumbled upon, such as my cancer, (which I get final results of my remmission tomorrow), and lives with me for a stretch of time, marinating or mutating until motive and opportunity align, this where I am ready to write and their is a computer to write it all on. However and whatever transpires from all this, from that first thought, through its evolution and then into its final incarnation, there will have been many minor defeats, reevaluations and struggles of concious over my audacity to speak on certain things, but my same pillars of reason still stand, just write, guided by what I feel I need to say, You find you keeping writing about the same themes, just make your stories better, the ensuing glory may or may not come in two ways, tangibly, your skills improve in articulating your words into a very arty, entertaining and  with powerful influence, for all those read your work, where glory manifests itself in popularity or money,etc. Secondly, intangibly. where the message is the star and glory manifests itself in accomplishment of dexterity, and further pursuit of skill not for money but in happiness of doing the work, being a craftsperson in your chosen discipline, then possibly giving it up if you need to and begininng all over again.This creates an environment of glory and freedom.
 See, Life does not always offer you the opportunity to fight for your life. Most acknowledge that there will be an eventual end but not they may not have a say in their ability to stay. The majority of people find death as the first symptom for them, and others are warned constantly but refuse to change and lastly there are those who fight to earn the right to stay. You dont have to be old to realise life is finite, tragedy lets us know regularly but true understanding of our mortality, can free us from self-imposed exile that happiness is  something to attain in the future, but it truly is the ability to find happiness in your moments, which stems from setting your life up to be prepared for opportunities for glory. Writing is my example but personally i dont know why so many people dont like the question of happiness, because I just want to live a glorious life built on my intentions in combination with physical and mental action and determination to realise it.